Meditation on Queen Vashti & Self-Denial
10 On the seventh day, when the king was merry with wine, he commanded…the seven eunuchs who attended him, 11 to bring Queen Vashti before the king, wearing the royal crown, in order to show the peoples and the officials her beauty; for she was fair to behold. 12 But Queen Vashti refused to come at the king’s command conveyed by the eunuchs. At this the king was enraged, and his anger burned within him….
[The king asked,] 15 “According to the law, what is to be done to Queen Vashti because she has not performed the command of King Ahasuerus conveyed by the eunuchs?” 16 Then Mecuman [one of the king’s attendants] said in the presence of the king and the officials, “Not only has Queen Vashti done wrong to the king, but also to all the officials and all the peoples who are in all the provinces of King Ahasuerus. 17 For this deed of the queen will be made known to all women, causing them to look with contempt on their husbands, since they will say, ‘King Ahasuerus commanded Queen Vashti to be brought before him, and she did not come.’ 18 This very day the noble ladies of Persia and Media who have heard of the queen’s behavior will rebel against the king’s officials, and there will be no end of contempt and wrath! 19 If it pleases the king, let a royal order go out from him, and let it be written among the laws of the Persians and the Medes so that it may not be altered, that Vashti is never again to come before King Ahasuerus; and let the king give her royal position to another who is better than she. 20 So when the decree made by the king is proclaimed throughout all his kingdom, vast as it is, all women will give honor to their husbands, high and low alike.”
The deposition of Queen Vashti seems like a clear-cut example of how not to behave. The message is clear to me: if you want to keep your position and keep your power, you have to learn how to play the game. You have to keep your head down and come when people call you. Otherwise everything will be taken from you, and you will never have power or influence ever again.
The urge to perform according to other people’s expectations is at the heart of my perfectionism. According to perfectionism, my power is dependent upon how much power other people give to me. People will give me their power if I perform according to their expectations. Although I understand that other people are flawed, and their expectations can be dubious, it feels like this is a game that I have to play if I am to have any measure of success or influence.
The rules for the queen in the book of Esther are simple: be beautiful, and please the king (Esther 2:4). But King Ahasuerus is no gentleman, and his own sense of power is extremely fragile, as evidenced by the fact that he cannot make a judgment for himself. The king’s attendants argue that Vashti’s refusal to obey the king’s command to appear at his banquet has the potential to unravel the gender and power dynamics within every household in the kingdom. Is it that Vashti is so powerful that her refusal can threaten the basis of all patriarchal structures? Or is it that the patriarchal structure is so fragile that any woman’s refusal of her husband could bring the whole system crashing down?
Either way you look at it, the book of Esther portrays power dynamics in a comical way. Biblical scholar Sidnie White Crawford even describes the king and his courtiers as “hapless buffoons” when compared to the “calm strength” of Vashti. (Women’s Bible Commentary, 2012, page 204). But what is Vashti even standing up for? The motive is not given in the text above; some have speculated that the king asked Vashti to come in only her crown, so she refused in the name of modesty. Regardless, Crawford regards Vashti as “more congenial to the modern woman [than Esther]. She is a strong female character who loses her position as a result of her refusal to acquiesce to the greater society’s demands upon her” (204). In other words, Vashti is something of a feminist icon, not to be denigrated, but venerated, even emulated!
Like I said earlier, the text does not give an explanation for why Vashti refused the command of the king. Is it possible that she refused, not for the sake of modesty or to bring down the patriarchy, but because… she just didn’t want to?
Is it possible that “because I don’t want to” is a good enough reason to disobey people with more power? Is it a good enough reason to give up your seat at the table? Is it a good enough reason to displease the most powerful man in the kingdom in order to please yourself?
Vashti is a monarch ruling over the Jewish people in exile. Her religious proclivities are a mystery. However, for the sake of discussion, let’s make an anachronistic leap and say that Vashti wanted to be a Christian. One of the basic tenets of Christian discipleship is to deny yourself, take up the cross, and follow Jesus (Matt. 16:34, Luke 9:23). If we view Vashti through the lens of Christian discipleship, how should she deny herself? Should she deny her personal comforts and self-respect, and go along with the king’s wishes? Or should she honor her comfort and self-respect and potentially deny herself the opportunity to continue ruling alongside the king?
The real question at the heart of this for me is, what is the worthier sacrifice? Is it more worthy to sacrifice your wants and desires for the sake of influence, power, and prestige, and to use those things for good? Or is it more worthy to sacrifice influence, power, and prestige for the sake of standing up for yourself and no one else?
